In conjunction with the release of Jack Neo's film "3 ge hao ren"(3 good men/one more chance), i decided to present...
3 DIRTY JOKES!!
by my teacher :-)
1.
There was this hospital located in a town far away from the city. As the blood supply was running low, they posted a big note outside the hospital which reads ("Please come and donate your blood. We will pay $30 per donation"). There wad also a lack of sperms, they posted another note saying ("Please donate your sperms. We will pay $50 per shot"). The next day, there were 2 long queues outside the hospital. One for blood donation, one for the sperm donation. Then there was a blonde standing in the blood donation queue and saw her very good friend, Joe, standing in the sperm donation queue. She asked "How much are you getting per donation?"Joe replied "oh! $50 per shot."Furious for the extra amount of money, the blonde left the queue. The next day, Joe was queuing in the sperm donation queue when he saw the blonde queuing in the same queue! He was suprised and asked her "Do you know that you are queuing in the sperm donation queue?"She nods her head."Then, where is the sperm?"She points to her mouth...
Hahahaha...
2.
There was this bus driver and a girl sitting behind him in the bus. She cited "If my mother is a cow, and my father is a bull, i will be a young cow!" "If my mother is a chicken and my father is a rooster, i will be a young chick!" "If my mother is a horse and my father is a horse, i will be a young horse!" She went about for a while, then the bus driver got furious and fustrated. "What if your mother was a lesbian, and your father is a gay?" he asked her. She thought about it for a while, then smiled at the bus driver and said "If my mother is a lesbian and my father is a gay, i will be a bus driver!!"
Hahahaha...
3.
There is a group of men hanging around in a local pub when one of them said "I gotta go home soon, or my wife will punish me serverly for going home late (like kneeling in a patch of broken glass while holding a washing board on his head)" Then one of his friend suggested "I teach you. Don't worry abt being late. Just quietly slide into bed while she is sleeping, and give her oral sex. This will help!!" After hearing, he stayed with them till 2a.m. and went back home. Sure enough, sleeping tight she was. As it was dark, he slowly gave oral sex. A faint moaning sound was heard, making the guy really happy. Then the guy said "i gotta go to the toilet, please paitenly wait for me here." When he went into the bathroom, he saw his wife leaving the toilet and asked " i thought you were in bed?" She replied "Mother-in-law is with us tonight..."
Hahahahahahaha....
Hope you like it!! ;-)
dRIVING_oUT
7:31:00 PM
As you can see, i'm fed up with my lousy internet connection.
It doesn't send/receive!!
Feel like throwing it off a skyscraper
oh ya, KILL ME PPL!
i'm sick n tired of this freaking shit!!!
guess e death lish id useful huh!
projects done, and exams coming
it's a race to the finish...
TO BE CON' TUNED
dRIVING_oUT
6:18:00 PM
Yup, still alive and kicking
juz got struck sown by the following:
!. SHITTY INTERNET CONECTION (FUCK U!!)
2. Projects
i am not making excuses here but it is jus y i didn't blog
anyways, I'M ALIVE!!
dRIVING_oUT
10:03:00 PM
Horoscope for libra in August 2005 - Bad Luck!!
Well, just fucked up everything in my life
Fucked up projects
Fucked up com
Fucked up router
Fucked up internet conection (i am using e desktop, mind you!)
Fucked up life
Fucked up everything!!!
God, can i really die right now!!
Now how can anyone be more Fucked up than me...
dRIVING_oUT
9:53:00 PM
Funny though i said this, cause u may be asking "den why the hell am i writing this post?"
juz fixed it, reconfig everything den ermz...
sian, sian, sian...
FUCKED UP EVERYTHING RIGHT NOW!!!!
dRIVING_oUT
7:01:00 PM
I feel like crying, my internet conection is really pathetic.
can't play dota, download stuff fast, so online stuff, chat...
den i so bored, i can even play with knives and needles.
so bored dat i can jus die...
"Yawn!!"
still got projects to rush and presentation to work on...
feel like eating more (dat's y i am so fat!!)
den feel not like eating
so fustrated!!!
dRIVING_oUT
9:02:00 PM
Hahaha...
i remembered abt last year's national day celebration
best day of my life!!!
fun!
2004 PRSS 4E1 Rocks!!!
den still got mdm yue come up to dance!
heehee....
dRIVING_oUT
8:08:00 PM
Oh... it's the 7 yue liao
so cannot go out late...
but got soooooooo many gd movies dat i can watch
nvm, most important is 2 go ochird buy tie n top gear
hahaha...
dRIVING_oUT
10:47:00 PM
Done with IISO project, got a one week 'grace' of rest, den more project and a formal presentation...
Gotta buy a tie damn soon...
nvm, i realized dat quite a lot of ppl r falling into my footsteps...
being abandoned, hated, walking alone...
juz hope they can walk out of this misery quick...
its not pleasant!
anways, i m now listening to these few songs:
Coldplay - Talk
Darude - Sandstorm
Black Eyed Peas - Shut Up
??? - Car crashes
Ohhh... suddenly thought of teachers day, gotta go back 2 prss
if u guys reading this wanna go back, chio me also leh, den go as a grp, nicer!
Thankz
dRIVING_oUT
8:24:00 PM
